Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Reality Rears Its Ugly Head

In the fouteeenth century they had the Black Death. In the seventeenth century there was The Great Plague. Periodically since them we have had Cholera, Typhoid, The Bloody Flux and Spanish Flu. Soi what will be the first plague of the twenty first century? We think we know.


Image source: cabletv.com

Reality Rears Its Ugly Head

The new "reality" TV show launched this week with the rather desperate sounding title Celebrity Love Island does not disappoint. It plumbs new depths for trash TV. The idea is that twelve Z - list celebrities (6 male, 6 female) are put on a tropical island paradise, supplied with food, booze, a pool, a Jacuzzi and a million hidden cameras and microphones. They are then left to do what health young adults do when given the chance to shrug off responsibility and live a pampered life .

The fatal flaw in the plan lies in the fact that the people involved are not healthy young adults but minor celebrities. They are people who on account of once having briefly threatened to reveal signs of talent or in some cases having briefly shagged someone who threatened to reveal signs of talent. All of them however are now intent on building a career by being famous for being famous.

One of the females who actually has genuine claims to some sort of celebrity, being a credible current affairs presenter has already broken down in tears and begged for merciful release, presumably so that she can kill her agent. The poor girl has obviously been driven to the edge by having the phrase "professional suicide" bounce around her head like a really irritating tune.

Of the rest the appropriately named Abi Titmuss, famous for having been the girlfriend of a minor league TV presenter who became famous for allegedly raping a real celebrity is the most famous. The alleged offence took place before the real celebrity was a celebrity and the minor league presenter was acquitted, but not before some sneaky lowdown bastard (or somebody's agent) had leaked to the media a porno video featuring the lovely Abi in action with some of her alleged boyfriend's friends. A career was born.

Best of the rest are a man famous for being the son of a very famous drunk, a former Future Olympic Champion and a woman who sold the story of her (alleged - by her at least) adulterous affair with a very famous soccer player and spent the cash on breast enlargement so that she could go into competition with the lovely Abi. as the world's most famous nonentity.

I have not heard of any of the rest and bear in mind these are British celebrities and I am a British news junkie. So you get the picture.

Celebrity Love Island is not about love, it is about sex. It is solely about who will get em' off and get down to it first purely for the titillation of a voyeuristic audience and without any kind of emotional attachment. It is the very lowest level of commercial sex.

The most depressing thing about Celebrity Love Island other than the fact that the only love likely to be seen is narcissism, the love that dares scream its name from the rooftops; is that it reveals the depth of humiliation these so called celebs will expose themselves to in order to stretch their allotted fifteen minutes of fame.
I have a horrible feeling the show will be a hit.


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